Unpredictable, Unexpected, But so magnificent

In the windy stormy night,
A breathtaking lady gazing upon the stars,
the night gleaming unlike all others before,
fixed her eyes upon a shooting star,
as it shot across the twilight she wished for a man,
not any man though,
A man of such great honor, a knight,
To rescue her from the madness the world has shown her
As the next day arose,
A man of such things she had wished upon crossed her path,
Sudden yet so magnificent he was all she ever dreamt for,
A dark knight to save her from all her sorrows,
The connection so undeniable, hard to not believe she had found whom she had been wishing for,
Words he whispered that touch her heart, a spark that lit like a wildfire,
So enchanting she was left breathless,
Without hesitation she opened herself up this knight she had found,
His voice as sweet as a melody, sending chills upon her skin,
Kindness she’d never found before,
His unique mind ever so beautiful,
So noble and trustworthy, no doubt entered her mind,
She had found the half of herself that had been missing for quite some time,
Without question she knew she’d found her soul mate,
Though haunting shadows may follow her,
His light shines upon her, darkness had lost her beautiful soul,
Only sun rays embrace her skin and lighten her heart,
Opening up herself up to ways she’d feared,
Ready to conquer all that comes her way now that she has his steady arms to hold her through the night,
Finally she believes in fate,  love appearing so quickly her heart warms simply by the thought of his name,
Ready to venture out into the world side by side with her ever so handsome dark knight,
Leading her to a life of happiness and a place to call home…
Forever the one who has stolen her heart<3
 

Safe and Sound

Living and breathing..still!! I really don't know where to begin with life so I guess I'll just write(:
I sit everyday inside my own mind, my strange yet unique complex mind thinking of all the things I want to accomplish in life, thinking of how I wish those who are hurting could find peace and happiness..like I have. I have my good and bad days, my up and downs...but truly at the end of the day I am content and happy because I believe that there are great things ahead. I want to allow people to understand me....because I know most don't, they see me this sweet kind hearted loving girl...think I shine and tell me I light up rooms with just even the slightest smile on my face. But what they do not know is deep down inside me there is a girl wanting to escape from where I've been, here running in circles one step forward and three steps backwards always, there is a girl who has witnessed pain and sorrow, heart ache, things I never wish to see others go through...I wake up everyday trying to be better than I was yesterday. I want so badly to reach out and make my dreams become reality but it is so hard to do so when I am stuck in a place where I have been so deeply hurt..I sometimes wish I could let go of everything and fall into the arms of my savior my god and ask him to just let me sit up in heaven with him safe and sound.. But I know I cannot do that. Because he saved me for a reason, and although somedays I wish he hadn't I know I have a great purpose in this life of mine, I am meant for something. And although I may just be another girl to some, to someone very special in my life I am actually something more...I've met someone who sees me for me, who understands me, and although I just met him, I strongly believe he is who god himself made just for me, were so alike on so many levels it simply amazes me, when I stopped and turned away from love, I met him and I believe again that just maybe it's possible that I can have true happiness in life, and a love that won't fail or lie to me or hurt me.. a love just a great as gods love for me. Don't doubt for a moment love, that I am doubting us...I cannot count all the ways that you have opened my eyes and heart to seeing things and believing in something I've longed to have for such a long time, a person to understand me, and love me for all I am and will be, your the one my soul has been searching for.

Well...with all this said I'm going to take a break from writing (:
You're all beautiful in your own unique way, stay that way...change for no one.
Love Caity Joan<3

Confused.

Howdy again,
So...I figured I'd sit down and write whatever is on my mind so if I'm all over place thats because my mind is.
So many things are turning around in my life has been up down up down...things always seem to go great than just horrible...and I'm truly just scared. I feel so strongly towards this guy, and I really don't know without a doubt the feelings are mutual I want them to be...he's amazing beyond words, but my past is affecting me from truly accepting that I have someone as great as him. So I don't know what to do.I don't want to allow my mind to drive me insane and push him away. I need to figure out how to accept that I do deserve someone great like him. But after my last relationship it's difficult.  I can see myself falling for this guy and that alone is scary after what I went through in my last relationship. So what should I do?
Work, well it sucks and I wanna quit so badly but I can't, this town sucks and I just wanna get the FUCK out. I feel stuck and that is one thing I don't like. I don't know what to do.
All I know is I want to see my babe...
welll...keep smilin y'all

Imagine

Well, hello there my dears(:
So I haven't written here in a good while so figured I'd catch y'all up on the exciting life I live..
So..for starters I got a job oh yeah whos proud!..second through my job I met this extremely amazing man, seriously unlike any other. I cannot put into words how great he is..
My lifes become hectic, so much stress and little time for me..but worth it in the end, I've really taken a turning point in life. I've fallen few times but keep getting back up. Fighting for what I want, not much seems to be going as I want it to..then again when does it ever lol. But things I believe are going to get much better soon...I really just want to get out of this town remove the memories of past from my life for good and have a fresh start. I'm tired of waking up each morning wondering and waiting to see what shitty thing lifes gonna throw at me next. I hope for the best...but prepare for the worst. I pray...that things fall into place soon because lately I've seriously been going crazy.
I'll write more later with that..smile hunnys!!!<3

And then it all falls down

I'm so beyond tired...tired of trying, tried of fighting, and pushing forward...everytime I say just let it be life will do what it's suppose to do nothing good comes from it. I feel cursed to live unhappy and miserable, to always have to fight but for WHAT?!! what am I even fighting for anymore, if it's happiness that surely isn't working I've fought for that all my life and I always end up back where I started, I don't want to let life get the best of me, to take who I am and the person I've grown to be away but it is...and you may not see it because I'm the best actress when it comes to hiding my sorrows and my pain but deep inside I am screaming at the top of my lungs for help...I just can't take this anymore, I feel myself falling. I feel myself giving up, I've fallen into a big black pit that I dugged for myself once again..I try my hardest to be positive to see the bright side and let go of my worries and stress but it's gotten to be to hard. I'm tired of living this way....I want to let go

My reason to believe

In 4 days it'll have been 2 years since my motorcycle accident and I'm very proud of that, I'm proud of myself for having overcome such a hard thing in my life. I'll admit I thought the 7 years of abuse was bad and hardest thing I'd ever go through but the accident changed my life, it changed me affected me in ways I never imagined and I never thought I'd get through it. Never thought I'd live to see the day I'm 18 years old and an adult and ready for my life to finally begin. I'm so beyond thankful for all of the people that supported me in the hardest most difficult time of my whole life, who believed in me and helped me get through it. 2 years ago I was having fun living life with no care, no appreciation for the little things taking life for granted two years ago was fun but now life is even better I thank god for giving me a second chance at life, for opening my eyes to the great things in life, for showing me what I was doing wrong..showing me how much my family loved me, showing me how much I was taking for granted. I thank my beautiful mother for standing by my side every day I was in the hospital for believing it me, telling me it'll be okay, for never giving up on me, for loving me so much..I thank my Aunt and Uncle for sending me a card and a box of food and a book reminding me how loved I am by them and praying for a healthy recovery.  I have that card on my bedroom wall hanging up so I can see it everyday. I thank my church for coming to see me in the hospital and all the support and prayers I received from them and from people I didn't even know. You all mean so much to me. I remember Pastor Robert coming into the hospital room and praying over me and speaking to me, I don't recall what you said because I was so out of it but THANK YOU. Thank you Bill for coming to see me and always being there for me and giving me advice when I need it, for caring about me, I may not show it a lot but I truly appreciate all you've done for me and all you're still doing. For believing it me I'm so glad that I know you. I remember you coming to the rehab I was at after I got moved from the hospital and bringing me pizza ohhh it was so yummy and so thoughtful, thank you. I can't thank you all enough if it weren't for you all I wouldn't of made it through, I don't think I'd be standing here today writing this to you guys. You are all amazing, wonderful people and you have a special place in my heart forever. I still have a long hard journey ahead of me but I know that I have god, and my family, my church family, my wonderful friends supporting me each step of the way. I know I can go to you and you'll help me through whatever comes my way. You are my reason to believe, my hope and faith my reason to wake up each day and push through. I may be strong but it was all of you that made me as strong as I am today. <3
I love you all
Caity Joan Greika

18 Waiting no more!

I'm 18 everyone 18!!!!! you know..the day I've waited for, forever!?? yeah it's come and I'm so happy.
So lets see what did I do for my birthday? I partied hearty! I got my lip pierced and then Tuesday went to court house to figure out money situation augh so stressful but it's getting there! anywho. I hear people no names mention talk. About what I post on facebook etc..and I'd just like to say. Just because I post bad things sometimes and cuss etc, doesn't make me bad, I've grown up a certain way my attitude is Fuck the world, like it or not. Take me as I am or leave me where I stand, I don't care. Everyone who truly knows me, knows I am very kind hearted and loving despite my cussing. I just wanted to put that out there (:
So today I'm going to drop papers off at court house and pick up my new eye glasses super excited!!! Life is so beautiful, I'm so happy that I'm finally 18 no more bs, no more having to do what OTHERS want me to do I can decide for myself. Feels great, saying 18 though sounds oldd to me. 17 sounded young now I feel like an old person ahhhh!!! but it's okay good feeling I suppose
anyways write later loves
SMILE!!
love caityyy