And then it all falls down

I'm so beyond tired...tired of trying, tried of fighting, and pushing forward...everytime I say just let it be life will do what it's suppose to do nothing good comes from it. I feel cursed to live unhappy and miserable, to always have to fight but for WHAT?!! what am I even fighting for anymore, if it's happiness that surely isn't working I've fought for that all my life and I always end up back where I started, I don't want to let life get the best of me, to take who I am and the person I've grown to be away but it is...and you may not see it because I'm the best actress when it comes to hiding my sorrows and my pain but deep inside I am screaming at the top of my lungs for help...I just can't take this anymore, I feel myself falling. I feel myself giving up, I've fallen into a big black pit that I dugged for myself once again..I try my hardest to be positive to see the bright side and let go of my worries and stress but it's gotten to be to hard. I'm tired of living this way....I want to let go